Before You Even Think About Getting A Divorce

1. Talk to a Marriage Counsellor or other professional who may be able to help you save your marriage.

Even if you don’t think there’s hope for the marriage, "Relate" can help you discover what went wrong, how to cope, and how to pick up the pieces and go on. Don’t wait for your spouse to participate. If you don’t know how to find a qualified counsellor, our firm will be glad to recommend one. Your employment, social or religious contacts might also provide leads.

2. Talk to a lawyer before you do anything.

Even if you don’t end up instructing a lawyer to deal with your separation or divorce, you would be well advised to get as much information as you can before you even discuss divorce with your spouse. There’s a lot to know about family law and even the simplest situation can be very confusing to families already in distress.

3. Do not move out of the marital home without talking to a lawyer first.

If the home is owned by one or both of you, there will be steps which ought to be taken to protect your legal position. If you have children from a previous relationship, you may wish to take steps to protect their inheritance. Additionally, if you are adequately re-housed, this may have an adverse effect on the outcome of financial proceedings.

The best advice is to stay in the house until after you talk to a lawyer unless your spouse is violent. If your spouse is violent, you must immediately take steps to protect yourself and the children. It is possible to apply for an Occupation Order excluding your spouse from the home. Such an Order will usually last long enough for the division of matrimonial assets to be dealt with.

4. Take concrete steps to safeguard your assets before you and your spouse begin discussing divorce.

One of these steps is to take possession of certain assets during separation, especially those assets you wish to be using, such as furniture, vehicles, computer equipment and tools of your trade and those assets that might be liquidated by your spouse, including precious gems and stones, other collectibles and cash.

Other protective measures you might consider in your divorce planning include:
1.) Protecting your own credit rating by freezing or closing joint cards and by blocking your spouse’s access to other joint credit such as a home equity loan;
2.) Closing joint bank accounts and opening accounts in your own, individual name;
3.) Changing the name of the responsible party on utility and other bills.

5. Review your Will

Or if you have not already done so, you should consider making a Will. A will made during the course of a marriage, or in contemplation of the marriage will remain valid so far as gifts to your spouse are concerned until Decree Absolute is pronounced at the end of divorce proceedings. Once you are divorced, your former spouse will be treated as though they have predeceased you.

If you do not have a Will or if you simply destroy your will and do not make another one and you die before the divorce is finalised, your spouse is likely to inherit the vast majority, if not all of your estate.

While this list will help you get started on the right track, it is by no means a complete list of all the things you need to do and know if you are considering a divorce.

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